Living on a prayer....
Hold on to what we got
We got each other and that's a lot. Well give it a shot. Halfway there living on a prayer. Bon Jovi circa 1986....
While in rehab, I got down on my knees and prayed to God with all my earnestness, please God lift the obsession from me and protect me from my affliction. I know that I meant it. Thirty-six years old, having a heart attack was not along the normal scheme of things. Why me? Why not me? I lived as if I didn't have a care in the world. Health issues? Nah not me....never that. It really didn't seem like anything significant at the time. Although I was very serious about it. The next day I couldn't believe how I felt. A glimmer of hope maybe, a relief of affliction possibly. I just don't know. I stood firm on not taking suboxone or Trazadone or anything else. I even watched my coffee consumption. Although it was a concentrated effort, something was different. I began reading my Bible again, proverbs and psalms....
After coming out of rehab, I thought for sure the obsession would come back... I prepared the whole time by thanking him for keeping it away and asked him to continue to keep it away... And as hours turned to days... I continued with it. Now that a few twenty fours have gone by it just seems that it has never come back. Triggers, others using, old spots ect. not to this day....but I keep it real simple and follow the suggestions of the twelve step fellowship. I don't always understand how this has happened but I am sure that it has.
I thank God for other things and pray in other ways today but
I'll never forget to pray to keep the obsession away.
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